C is for contrary. I am sitting here, a Sunday afternoon, probably one of the only Sunday's we haven't had rain, a beautifully sunny day, ladyless ! Why ? Well I have one, but today she has tried to probably repay me for a weekend a few weeks ago when she decided she didn't want to do something then blamed me for not doing something ! Yes, one of the inexplicable ways of women !
Mind you, she is a bit of a problem girl ; but first of all let me tell you her good points, no, excellent points. She has a great figure, she doesn't wear much make-up, but actually doesn't need it, she is stunning, she is a delightful clothes-horse, by that, of course, I mean she dreesses well for all occasions, petite - got the picture ?
But what she doesn't have is conversation, she can stand, sit or even lay and look pretty, look pretty `dam` pretty, and while on your arm everyone is envious !
Also, she only eats at lunchtime, well if you could call it eating that is, a bowel of soup and a cracker is her perfect lunch and now she doesn't drink, so to take her out for a meal puts one in a difficult position, particularly since I cannot survive on a bowel of soup and a cracker and like my drink ! So to say, "come on, lets go and have lunch", may sound good in words, but anything more, it is just being with her and of course it is essentially eating by yourself ... and as I have said, conversation is not too stimulating at the best of times.
OK, so why isn't conversation stimulating ? Judge for yourself ; she doesn't like sport, he favourite TV Channel is BBC News, so doesn't look at any of the soaps, or any of the comedy sketches, like The Good Life, Last of the Summer Wine, Vicar of Dibley etc. etc., doesn't like watching quiz shows, Strictly Come Dancing, or general variety, she claims, however, she loves News, and politics !
So, I try to introduce humour to her vocabulary and look at Any Questions, Newsnight, What the Papers Say ... this is nearly always politics tinged with a smattering of humour ! But no, she doesn't like these programmes ... and she goes to bed at 10.00 ! And bearing in mind that 10.00 is often early for finishing at a restaurant, with me having a meal and she her bowel of soup, future evening `meals out` seem a no-goer !
I sometimes manage to drag her to a film that we both can accept, which is usually a moving story with a tinge of humour, a Russel Crowe one had me with a tear in my eyes on the final credits, but when the lights went up, there was not even a glimmer of a water stain on her cheek.
By now you are wondering what on earth do I see in her, a difficult one, she has had a hard life and a tough marriage - but anyone who gets married and on her wedding night the husband was crying because he had left Mum - not quite like that, but almost - does rather cool a marriage. At least to start with there should be only one woman if the husbands eye, I say at least to start with since how do you counteract living with a beautiful woman and having to be careful if yuou touch ! It could drive any sane man to women ! And it did ! I firmly believe that she has a heart but simply cannot uncover it, or it has been lost - when, or if - she does I believe she will be a delightful lady, she has a lot of hang-ups but none a good man cannot change, so I believe ... so I am sticking with it. Nearly everyone tells me I am a fool - but then I was probably a fool to be married for almost forty years, to someone who was not socially minded in even a small way ... but that's another story !
It certainly does get a bit much though, when she constantly enquires if she is pretty ( insecure, maybe ? ), do you like my dress ( again ? ), maybe OK if you felt she was doing it for you, but in truth she really is only doing it for herself. There is no doubting that she is stunning, but I am learning the hard way, no matter what the outside looks like, its what inside that counts ion the long term ... but to have both, would be a dream, so for the moment I am continuing to dream !